My Big Hairy Audacious Tiny, Sweet Thing

Baby Sumatran Orangutan with arms rased

You know it’s funny, how sometimes our lives seem to go in circles.

Except sometimes, the circles are really spirals, they bring us to a higher level of whatever it is.

This is something that came out very powerfully for me tonight as I thought about an idea that I’d been fantasizing about for many years, except this time I wasn’t just thinking about it as a dream, but rather as a goal. A gigantic, hairy, audacious goal, but a goal nonetheless. About a week ago in the first session of the Cash and Joy Provocateurs, Catherine Caine asked me to do just that. She asked each of us in the group to share our Big Harry Audacious Goal. It wasn’t something I had thought much about, but after just a moment I realized that there is one thing that kept coming up in different ways almost for as long as I can remember, and I knew that this was my BHAG.

I want to share it with you, but I also need to understand that while this goal is tremendous at the moment it’s very much what Havi calls “a tiny, sweet thing.” So it needs to be handled with care, and that’s what I’m doing here.

So what is this thing?

It’s an event, actually a series of events, each one with over 10,000 people in attendance. A sort of rally of transformation, alchemy, wonder, spirit and outright magic.

I can feel how my whole life is leading to this point, for me to be standing on the stage telling stories, weaving processes of spiritual alchemy, as we gently but powerfully allow the shifts within each of us to take the next steps becoming even more ourselves.

This isn’t just a speech, or a workshop. It’s a fully immersive experience. We use lighting, projections, sound and other tools of the theater to create an environment which envelops everyone who attends, and completely surrounds them. This environment can change and morph from one moment to the next as the stories and dreams unfold.

I could go on and on, I think I have shared what wants to be shared at the moment about this.

Let me answer some questions that you might be thinking before I go:

When will this happen?

I don’t know, it will happen when it’s ready, and I’m ready.

Where will it be? How much will it cost? Where do I sign up?

I’m thrilled that you’re interested, but I don’t really know that either.

Don’t you realize that this will never work? That events like this are too expensive, too hard, crazy, or whatever?

I truly appreciate your concern, and I’m not trying to do this next week. I know that there’s a lot to it, and that there are probably lots of places where things can go wrong (there are in every endeavor, large or small.) But please understand that the biggest mistake I could make is to not do this, it is the calling of my heart.

Can I help?

Maybe? Probably? I’m not in a place yet to look for partners, or people to help, or even know what kind of help I would be looking for. However, that will change, when the time comes, so watch this space. If you like, leave a note in the comments about your interest, and I’ll keep you in mind.

Today I want to be very specific about what kind of comments I’m looking for. As I said, this is a tiny, sweet thing, which needs to be protected and cared for as it grows and solidifies. I would love your support, and if reading this sparks something super exciting in you, I’d love to hear about that too. If you think I’m nuts, you’re probably right, but please, keep it to yourself for the moment. I’m not looking for advice, criticism, or even really suggestions, I most love to hear how this resonates with you, in your heart, if there’s something you truly feel moved to share.

Thank you for letting me share my Big Hairy Audacious Goal with you. Don’t be surprised if I don’t talk about this much for a while, then again don’t be surprised if I do. I’m just excited to see how my tiny, sweet thing grows.

Allowing things to be easy can be hard

There’ve been a number of major things in my life recently which have all been leading me back to a focus on consciously including the divine in my life. This isn’t a new idea from, since around the end of my senior year of high school I’ve explored spirituality and connection in lots of different ways. Today I consider myself a “mystical freelancer.”
I guess the resurgence really started when I wanted to try the Resident Pricing Exercise which Mark Silver teaches at the Heart Of Business. Mark talks about starting this exercise by performing something called The Remembrance. This is a wonderful practice, which comes out of the Sufi tradition. I had never done anything like it, and found it to be remarkably profound. It’s all about “remembering” our connection to the divine, and really feeling that inside. This quickly led to me starting and later finishing Mark’s 14 day challenge.
At the same time I’ve also been taking the Grace Blessings Mastery class which my dear friend Erika Rock teaches. If I was going to summarize this class in five words, they would be:

Letting Go and Letting God

It’s all about discovering how magical and how easy things can be when we let go and let the divine work through us.
Problem is, I was having a lot of trouble letting go. I really felt for the last several days like I was in the hard. I felt frustrated, as if whatever I did wasn’t enough. I felt adrift.

“But wait, there’s more!”

And on top of all of this, I had a session tonight with spiritual alchemist Melody Kiersz. We explored what I’ve been experiencing, and she helped me to really feel it, which created the opportunity to shift. Things started to become very clear as I realize that I was not very open to receiving from the divine.
I recognized this as programming, something which was entrained into me, not something I really believed.
Then, all of a sudden, I felt very strongly that receiving from the divine is, in fact, a form of recognition, of worship.
I realized that to receive gracefully, open, fully is a gift to the giver, and the divine really wants to give to us, to me.
And that realization changed everything.
I have to say, that I post this with some trepidation about how you, my readers will respond. But I’m really feeling called to do it, and so I will answer the call and push the button.